I gotta stop lying to myself. Iíll start by telling some of the hard, cold truth now.
The Alex I think Iím in love with is not the real Alex. Heís just a kid. Iím not really in love with him. I just think I am.
Iím an almost 28 year old unemployed, disabled woman who owns practically nothing and has no real hopes for the future. I owe lots of money, including a large school loan and Iím about to go bankrupt.
Iím immature, have a bad temper, and am too sensitive for my own good.
I have many addictions including smoking, masturbating, and looking up internet porn.
See, that wasnít so hard, was it? It hurts to look at myself in this way, it makes me depressed in fact, but I think itís good to tell myself the truth. I need to know whatís broke before I can fix it.
Yours truly, RACH